Disney, the Fakest Place on Earth

I often tell people, if you’re looking for a screaming, crying, whining kid, look no further than Disney, the “happiest” place on Earth. I have mixed feelings of Disney. It is undoubtedly a monstrous conglomerate with a facade of happiness that cranks out superficially artist movies and annoyingly poppy music. But really, is that always a bad thing? When searching for a nice, sterile environment that at least feels better than the rest of the world, there’s almost no better place.

Take vacationing, for instance. There are many who travel to tropical resorts to places like Mexico or the Bahamas to enjoy a little slice of paradise. But in reality, when most folks visit these places, they never see the extreme poverty or drug gangs or homelessness or crime of Mexico or the Bahamas. Instead, they stick to the candy-coated resorts that shield them away from the realities of their “paradise”. How is this different than Disney, a place that screen their employees based on physical appearance and place more emphasize on cleanliness than the quality of their food?

And then there’s Disney’s music, something that often hits me like a wasp to the ear. Yet I find myself playing this music for my kids… on purpose. Why? For the same reason that when my kids are in the car, I flip the radio to either local Christian pop station or find something from the 50’s or 60’s. These options are often already filtered and sanitized for my kid’s ears.

And then there’re the gems in Disney productions. There are a lot of Disney movies and other creations that are… well, garbage. Things that are so bad I feel insulted having wasted my time on it. The ending of Lilo and Stitch for one. But through the muck, there are certainly productions that are wonderful. The Fox and the Hound remains one of my favorite movies of all time. And I occasionally catch myself singing “Chim Chimney” on a particularly good day. And in spite of the distaste toward crowds, I’ll openly admit that I have annual passes to the parks that I take my family to enough times that both of my kids could easily be park tour guides.

So, love it or hate it, Disney is Disney, forever earning and spending billions on fake happiness for millions of families and other nuts who need a little sanitized get away. And I would openly admit that I too am one of these nuts.